CASE VIGNETTE (Based on a true situation):
Susan had been divorced for 5 years and her children, ages 9 and 11 and her had always been very close. The kids' biological father had never really been a part of their lives so Susan tried to be both a mom and a dad to them. Lately, the kids have been more difficult to control and she was tired of struggling with them and trying to work full-time to support them all. So it was with great expectation that Susan looked forward to marrying Tim, a man she could count on to help her with the kids and to take over some of the disciplining chores so that she could get a much needed break. The kids needed a strong male figure around, someone whom they couldn't ride roughshod over and at last they could all be a real family again.

CASE VIGNETTE (Based on a true situation):
Mary was thrilled! After a difficult first marriage, she met a wonderful man, fell in love and quickly said, "I do!" Her son also seemed to like the man, which made things that much better. However, her relationship with her son's father felt like it was getting worse. They sometimes spoke angrily at each other on the phone and dropping her son off on visits was a tense situation that she never looked forward to. Ominously, this stressful situation with her ex was beginning to affect her present marriage. Her husband began to resent her ex and even started to become critical of her handling of him, getting more and more frustrated with this conflict. She felt so powerless to change anything! What started out as a happy second marriage was becoming tension-filled and a miserable experience for all.

CASE VIGNETTE (Based on a true situation):
Karen had a disappointingly short first marriage that left her with two young children to raise. Even more disappointing was the fact that the children's father didn't want to be part of their lives, a fact that as time wore on, began to alarm Karen. Who would fill the role of her children's father? Didn't all children deserve to be raised by both a mother and father? How quickly should she begin to search for a partner? How big of a factor should his parenting skills be? How can she tell what his skills are? Is this something he will get better at or should she be the one to teach him?

CASE VIGNETTE (Based on a true situation):
Kris' second marriage seemed to be going well at first. She brought one child to this second relationship however the man she married was childless. He was brought up in a family of strict disciplinarians and as a result, he had some very strong opinions as to the way she was raising her son. Sure, she was a bit lax with her son at times but she felt that her easy style resulted in less power struggles between them. On the other hand, her new husband believed her son was "walking all over her" and he was determined to correct the situation.

CASE VIGNETTE (Based on a true situation):
Phoebe and her three children had been with each other for some time now. The divorce seemed to be behind them and life had settled into a "kind of" normal groove. Her relationship with her children was one of trust and respect. The children had time with their father and that was working out well for all of them. The only cloud on the horizon was the fact that she was lonely and was beginning to realize that she needed to begin a new relationship. However, when she thought about it more closely, she wondered how this decision would affect everyone. Was it fair to her children to bring a stranger into their lives? Suppose he also had children? Was that good or might that be even more disruptive? What role should he play? Should he try to be their parent or what? How was she ever going to sort all this out?

Family change can be difficult but you don't have to go it alone. If you find yourself identifying with these case vignettes or you have your own unique situation and you would like some professional help, call our offices at 425-895-7295 or 425-747-0155.